Ready for a New Year!

Ah so as I'm sitting here today, snowed in from about, oh 16 inches of snow :(, I figured I had some time to catch up on the blog! Christmas was really awesome! I love giving gifts and surprising people so I cannot wait to have a wife and kids so I can surprise them with gifts :). I have to say though I'm really looking forward to the new year! I cant really explain why, but for some reason I think theres going to be something special this year!! I guess well have to see :) Other than that theres nothing really new to talk about, my final grades were ehh :( this year but I passed so I guess I just hafta make up for it next semester! Well I'll write another entry right after the new year before I head to Baltimore but I hope everyone had a great Christmas and has a Happy New Year!

-Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely

almsot done...

I cannot wait for the semester to be over...

I'm dying with all this work haha but life is not always fun or easy right?

On hold

I know it's the holiday's and were supposed to be happy and all, and I guess I'm getting there lol but I'm usually the last one on the holiday bus so I'm getting there! But for me it's been a little rough lately, and believe me I'm not writing this in hopes of sympathy or pity but I'm writing it because I don't know where else to turn. I feel like this is my only outlet if you will, but do you ever feel like there's no one to talk to? Like you feel so isolated in the world that no one can hear you or even if they could they wouldn't understand?  Now don't get me wrong I know there are so many people out there I could talk to but for some reason I don't want them to have to take on that burden. I know they say that God never gives you more than you can handle and I truly believe that I can handle this situation but no matter how strong I try and be there are times when I just want to cry. I would love to have that special girl in my life that I could treat like the most important thing in the world and I would love to get on a bike again and I would love more than anything to pass around a soccer ball but everyday I wake up, and while I thank God for every single thing he's blessed me with, no matter what reality finds a way to remind me everything I'm missing out on; do you know what I'd give to have just one more chance to play a game of soccer? I'd give up everything, literally everything. I'd love to go out and have an amazing time with friends and not have to rely on parents to help me when I get back in, I'd love to be able to go watch a soccer game again and not get so mad at life that I begin to forget everything I have to be thankful for. I'd love, if only for a day, to feel remember what it feels like to walk into the shower. I know I am so blessed for opportunity's I've been given but it really frustrates me in a way when people say I'm an inspiration because to me, those soldiers fighting over in the Middle East are inspirations or that young child with cancer all throughout their bodies but they still manage to put on a smile that's an inspiration. See life shouldn't be measured but what we do but by how we do it. I sat outside and I was looking at the sunset and I was so thankful that God kept me around to see that sunset. It's amazing how life turns out and none of us know what tomorrow will bring but that is the beauty of life. So life is really about living and if we don't live we will never know what might have been but I can't help but wonder how my life might have turned out had I not been in that accident but the thing I do know is that God kept me here for a reason and it might take me a lifetime to figure out that reason but I hope before it's all over I get the chance to find out.

Tonight I'll end with a quote that I think speaks pretty true about life and perseverance,

“Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.”

Goodnight world

Almost Done!!

Ah the time has finally come! The stress is high, the assignments are pilling up and the prayers for good grades has begun! Can you guess?! Yup, its the end of the semester and it is so close to being over but it is also so far away. So I guess what I have to look forward to is, two weeks of sleepless nights and two weeks of chaos but hey thats what makes life fun right?! I like to try and be spontaneous in life so I've decided that the week before school starts I'm going to just pick a place on the East coast and just go. I'm not going to make any plans or reservations I'm just going to go and see where life leads me :). So I don't know if you guys have heard it yet but I'm sitting here listening to Darius Rucker's new song "This" and the chorus is,


Every stoplight I didn't make 
Every chance I did or I didn't take
All the nights I went too far
All the girls that broke my heart
All the doors that I had to close
All the things I knew but I didn't know
Thank God for all I missed
Cause it led me here to this

Isn't it funny how each and everyday there are things that might make us frustrated, whether it's missing that red light when were already late for class or when something happens in life that we can't comprehend at the time but when we look back we see that had that thing not happen then we may never have met that special person or gotten that particular opportunity? We are so so focused sometimes on the things that happen to us that we feel are bad or unfair that we may never see the bigger picture because as the lyrics say, "Thank God for all I missed, Cause it led me here to this."Sometimes in life we are so busy seeing all that is wrong that we at times have trouble seeing all thats right.

Caught Up In Life

Yesterday was Thanksgiving and I could write a book on how many things I have to be thankful for and I thank God every night for everything I've been blessed with in life but yesterday as I was sitting there, listening to some music I began to think about my life and where I'm going in life. The moment that changed my life was not the car accident I was in or being told I'd never walk again, the moment that changed everything for me was when I woke up two days after the accident and the doctor walked in and told me something that changed everything, he told me that I should have been killed. Its hard to explain how I felt in that moment but it was like the world stopped, it was as if life would never again be measured by a grade on a paper or by the score of a Sunday football game. For me that was the moment that changed how I looked at everything in life. It may sound cliche but when I drive down to the most secluded spot I can find and I watch the sunset fall over the bay, it is the most powerful feeling ever. When I get to hug my niece and hear about what she did in school that week I'm not just listening, I'm appreciating that moment I get to spend with her.

We get so caught up in just trying to get through the things we think are trivial in life that we lose the perspective on what it means to live. I am thankful everyday that I get to be stressed out about a paper that's due or if I am sitting in traffic I'm not angry or frustrated because those are the things that I am so thankful I get to do. I don't want to come off as saying I'm somehow perfect or that I don't ever get frustrated or angry because I do, I'm human, what I try to remember is that life is more than the milestones in life, it's about how we get there.

I lay in bed every morning wondering what opportunities I will have that day or what challenges I will get to face and everyday I repeat what that doctor told me four years ago because I am so thankful he didn't have to tell my parents that night that I was killed.

Life for me is going to be defined by things that may appear trivial to some but will mean the world to me. I can't wait for the chance to kiss my wife and kids goodbye every morning or to call my fiance just to say hi. I can't wait play catch with my son and play house with my daughter. What I want out of life is not money or fame but is the things that people should value most but get too caught up in life to remember.

I hope everyone had an amazing Thanksgiving and will have a great Holiday season and please try and take some time to treasure all the things in life that truly matter before you never get the chance to.

God Bless

FREE MONEY GIVEAWAY!!

haha so no I'm not giving away any money but I just wanted to throw a catchy title out there to see if people actually read the blog or I am just talking to myself on the internet lol Well I guess talking out loud to myself online is better than if I were doing it in public, they'd probably send me somewhere to get help hah...well I dont have much else to say this weekend, I went to an amazing fundraiser party for University of Maryland Shock Trauma  and I met some very awesome people with so many connections in the state of Maryland! anddd I was invited to Cal Ripken's gala in Baltimore in February!!! Don't get me wrong having  a spinal cord injury blows and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy but the people I've met and the opportunities I've been given and hopefully will get are unbelievable :)

It's funny how life puts you exactly where you should be

Directions

I've spent the last four years trying to look at my life and see whats next. I've been so busy with school and therapy that I've forgotten what's important in life. I think it's only natural to always want to know our future but isn't that what living is for? I've also been thinking (and this may seem kinda odd coming from a guy but), its funny when you meet that one person in life that has an effect on you like no one before. The moment I saw her it was kinda like everything made sense. It's kind of hard to explain but no matter who else I meet all I can think about is her. I don't want to sound like a creeper or stalker or even an overdone obsession haha but its so hard to explain this feeling. Some people may think I'm crazy for this or delusional for thinking something like this but to all those people all I can say is that I've truly never felt like this for someone and the feeling I got when I first saw her was, indescribable. Well many people may think I'm crazy or just, whatever you want to call it, I really don't think I am lol.

I know I haven't blogged lately but I've just been so busy with the end of the semester coming up and judging by the D I got on my last test I got back today, I've got a lot of work to do! I promise to keep up with the blog more often and I will try and get my act together for school!











You meet thousands of people & then you meet one person & your life is changed..forever :)

May not look like what we expect

All the time I am looking for signs to point me one way or another but I'm starting to realize two things, the signs we are looking for may not be in the form we are looking and one of the most important things in i have realized is that we dont have to see the whole path in order to move forward, we only have to see where our next step is going to be



God Bless

Decisions

So I have the opportunity to be in the Miami project but it would mean that I have to put my school on hold. How do I decide? School will always be there but the longer I live with my injury the less function I may get back. But I also have to acknowledge that I have to live my life, walking on my feet or being in the chair. How can I make the right choice? Either way I will have to put something on hold in my life but how can I know which one? I pray every night that God will show me what decision to make and I know he will but I have 4 weeks to make a decision that will change the rest of my life. I guess thats why decision are never easy. I want the answer to be made for me in many respects because I'm scared, I'm scared that I will regret a decision either way. Life is so unpredictable and so special, life is a path that is taken one step at a time and more often than not we may not be able to see where our next step will land. I have faith the God will make it land on firm ground and more importantly I have faith that God will show me what's next. The night I had my car accident I thought I lost everything important to me in life, instead I learned what was really important to me in life. These next few weeks will be difficult but they will also be life changing. I hope I will make the right choice but I may never know what the right choice is, I only hope that the choice I make will lead me to where I'm supposed to be.

God Bless

Life

Life is never what we expect, rather it is a series of twists and turns, highs and lows, the good, great and terrible. Life is not what happens to us but how we react to what happens to us. I have learned one very important thing in the last 4 years, the biggest challenge we face in life is ourselves.